Most people (at least in the West) lack access to a system of support which they can rely on to guide them through times of existential change or crisis. In the past we usually entrusted this task with institutions such as a church or with the elders of a community. Today our culture is far more fragmented and individualistic, which brings with it a lot of freedom and new opportunities, but it can at the same time leave us vulnerable in times of existential challenge.

Premodern cultures and societies used to develop around traditions which would guide people through times of existential hardship or need. These traditions included knowledge about the archetypical challenges people face and the patterns of how people optimally encounter and persevere through such challenges. This information was usually gathered over centuries of conversation and practice. Today we have mostly severed our connection to such traditions and the knowledge and experience of these traditions are at this moment in time heavily diluted or largely inaccessible to us.  

The reason we need support when dealing with existential questions is that to make a reasonable, authentic existential choice it is necessary to create alignment between oneself and the objective and absolute qualities of reality. The objective and absolute qualities of reality are to a large degree mysterious and inaccessible to us. Without proper guidance of how to develop a structured and disciplined approach to our existential challenges it becomes hard to determine how to best use our agency and to make good progress.

To avoid fumbling in the dark, without the ability to determine a clear, safe, and efficient path forward, it is important that we seek skillful and artful guidance. Without proper instruction we are likely to repeat errors without recognizing it, or reinforce an old pattern without actually breaking it. 

The errors people typically make in a time of existential exploration depends on their personality or level of development. The following list highlights some examples:

• Trying to merge with others through rituals or ceremonies, without ever forming a true self-image. 

• Looking for a strong guru-like character to follow, without ever stepping into one’s own power. 

• Trying to bargain with the absolute powers of reality in order to escape actual transformation, awareness, and authentic individuation and expression.

• Trying to seek knowledge or growing one’s skill level beyond what is necessary in an attempt to maintain a sense of control when faced with forces greater than oneself.

• Misjudging the qualities of the objective center of reality, for example by projecting the values of one’s own society or culture onto the objective and absolute qualities of reality.

• Being impatient and rushing to get to the other side of a challenge, without ever truly penetrating the core of the lesson one needed to learn.

• Being attracted to things that create immediate relief, but which does not provide actual learning and progress.

• Misjudging one’s own level of development and the developmental task one is faced with.

• Trying to overcome challenges by using force, without having the ability to adapt oneself by changing one’s internal attitude. 

• Being driven by competition with others in a way that takes up one’s entire focus, and doing so without much consideration for other people. 

• Looking to be needed by others, to the point where this overshadows most other things.

• Seeking power for the purpose of gaining social recognition and status, and because one wants power over people.  

• Strictly dividing the world in black and white, without the ability to perceive and discern nuances.

• Finding differences and conflict threatening and being very dedicated to group consensus. 

• Believing that differences with others are superficial because everyone fundamentally is equal.

To learn how to recognize and work through the set of errors you are likely to make on the path towards a reasonable and authentic existential position, we believe you need guidance that is capable of supporting you becoming structured, disciplined, and skillful in your existential exploration. At the Hours of Being we specialize supporting people navigating the uncertainty of their existential process by providing them the tools they need to increase their chances of success.